this is just for fun.....i dont mean 2 hurt someone
1- Sardar ji is buying a TV "Do you have color TVs?" "Sure." "Give me a green one, please."
2- Sardar Ji calls Air India. "How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?" "Just a sec," says the rep. Thank you." says the Sardar ji and hangs up.
3- Sardar ji is filling up a job application He promptly fills in the lines on NAME, AGE, ADDRESS, etc. Then came the column SALARY EXPECTED After much thought he writes: Yes
4- Sardarji goes into a store and sees a shiny object. He asks the clerk, "What is that shiny object?" The clerk replies, "That is a Thermos flask." The Sardar asks, "What does it do?" The clerk responds, "Keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." The Sardar says, "I'll take it!" The next day, he walks into work with his new Thermos. His Sardar boss sees him and asks, "What is that shiny object with you?" He said, "It's a Thermos flask." The boss asks, "What does it do?" He replies, "Keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." The boss said, "Wow, what do you have in it?" The Sardar replies, "Two cups of coffee and a coke."
5- Sardarji fixed an answering machine at home. Two days later he disconnected it because he was getting complaints like "phone utha ke bolta hai ghar pe nahin hai."
6- What does Sardarji do after taking photocopies? He compares it with the original for spelling mistakes.
7- What does Sardarji do when he has one white sheet and wants an extra sheet? He makes a photocopy of the white sheet.
8- There was a meeting of all the Surd freedom fighters. They were planning for a free Punjab. Santa Singh raised a point, "Oh...we'll take Punjab from India but how would we develop it?" That was a tough one indeed. Banta Singh had a brainwave... "No problem! We'll attack Amrika, it would take over us and then we would become a State of USA and develop automatically." All the surds became happy with this very simple solution but an old surd was not. Someone asked him why he wasn't happy. The old surd replied, "THAT'S ALL VERY WELL...WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF BY CHANCE WE TOOK OVER AMRIKA???"
9- Sardarji went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman. "Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied. He hurried home removed his turban and changed his hair style, and returned to tell the salesman "I would like to buy this TV." "Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," Salesman replied. "Damn, he recognised me," he thought. He went for a complete disguise this time, haircut, new hair colour, new outfit, big sunglasses, waited a few days, saw the salesman again. "I would like to buy this TV." "Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied. Frustrated, he exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a Sardar?" "Because that's a microwave," he replied.
10- Why did 18 Sardars go to a movie? Because below 18 was not allowed.
11- How do you measure Sardarji's intelligence? Stick a tire pressure gauge in his ear
12- Sardarji proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears. Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one. He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and *again* barefoot!"
13- What do you do when a Sardar throws a hand grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.
14- What do you do when a Sardar throws a pin at you? Run like crazy....he's got a hand grenade in his mouth.
15- How do you make a Sardar laugh on Saturday? Tell him a joke on Wednesday.
16- What is the Sardar doing when he holds his hands tightly over his ears? Trying to hold on to a thought.
17- Why do Sardars work seven days a week? So you don't have to re-train them on Monday.
18- Why can't Sardars make ice cubes? They always forget the recipe.
19- How did the Sardar try to kill the bird? He threw it off a cliff.
20- What do you call 10 Sardars standing ear to ear? A wind tunnel.
The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....
********************************************** DOCTOR- ur kidney has failed SARDAR- doctor what r u talking my kidney never went to school then how it failed frm now ill put tution thank u doctor *********************************************
HISTORY TEACHER- Kalidas was having a brother who makes shoes what was his name.... SARDAR- ADIDAS *********************************************
The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....
the jokes were gud but u shud have posted them in the community shelf........
Put your hand on a stove for a minute and it seems like an hour. Sit with that special girl for an hour and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.
-Albert Einstein
Generally people who take the piss out of other people hang around in groups of five, because they have a fifth of a personality each.
- Eddie Izzard
It's my life
And it's now or never
I ain't gonna live forever
I just wanna live while I'm alive
-Bon Jovi
By the time a son realizes that his father was probably right, he has a son who thinks he is wrong.
-Anonymous
While travelling a sardar was carrying a binocular with him.
But he never seemed to use it while looking outside the window.
A co-passenger who was travelling with him asked why he was carrying binoculars.
The sardar simply said ... "I am on my way to see a distant relative."
Once, two Sardars were feeling bored and decided to play a few games
of chess to pass the time.
They were doing this for some time, when two more sardar friends
dropped by. Seeing them play chess, they said -
"Come on guys, we are feeling bored too. Let us play doubles!"
Our Sardar, one day is at the railway station. He asks one man "When will Rajdhani Express go from here"?Man Replies 12.30. "When will Punjab Express go from here"?Man Replies 10.30. "When will Deccan Queen go from here"?Man Replies 12.30. Thus the sardar goes on asking for all the trains. Now the man gets fed up and asks whether he wants to go to punjab by train or not.Sardar replies, "NO. I only want to cross the tracks!"
Once a Sardarji went to the city of Mumbai for the first time to meet his father. His father had asked him to keep walking in the direction of the sunrise until he eventually reached hishouse. Since, the Sardarji was new to the city he decided to ask a passerby the direction in which the sun rose in Mumbai - east, west, north or south?The passerby who was also a Sardarji thought for some time and then said, "Main bhi is sheher mein naya aaya hoon!" ( I am also new in this city!)
Sardarji bought a brand new Maruti and decided to drive down from Amritsar, where he lived, to Jalandar to meet his friend. He reached there in a few hours. After spending a few days there, he decided to return, and called up his mother to expect him in the evening. But he didn't reach in the evening and not the next day either. When he finally reached home on the third day, his distraught mother ran and asked him " Arre Puttar, ki hoya?" (What Happened, My Son?)
The Sardarji got out, obviously very tired from a long journey, and said, "Oy, ye Marutti wale pagal hain, agge jaane waaste chaar gear banaate hain, aur pichche jaane waaste sirf ik?" (These Maruti Car people are crazy! They have four gears for going forward, but only one for going back!)
The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....
Santa Goes to heaven Santa Singh was in the hospital, near death, so the family sent for his friend Banta. As Banta singh stood beside the bed, santa Singh's frail condition grew worse, and he motioned frantically for something to write on. Banta singh lovingly handed him a pen and piece of paper, and Santa used his last ounce of strength to scribble a note. Then he died.
Banta singh thought it best not to look at the note just then, so he slipped it into his jacket pocket. Several days later, at the funeral, Banta singh was visting Santa's family. He realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he'd worn the day Santa died. "You know," he said, "Santa handed me a note just before he died. I haven't read it, but knowing Santa, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration there for us all."
He unfolded the note and read aloud, "You're standing on my oxygen tube!"
Sweet Revenge Santa Singh told his wife that after his death she should marry Banta Singh. "But why should I marry Banta who is your enemy no 1" enquired his wife. Santa quipped, "Oh Darling, this is the only way I can take my revenge from that useless fellow. Ha! Ha! Ha!!
The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....
Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He then removes his turban and throws it away as well. His shirt, pant, socks and watch follow suit. The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on. Oye, I am only following the instructions
- 'Answer in brief'.
The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....
Moderation Team
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