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Ask community Community Discussion Question: sardar jokes......!!!!!!
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anshul sharma (216)

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Do u know what does the computer
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INTEL Inside....

IDIOT outside

<div style="font-family:arial,sans-serif;font-size:11px;">
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anshul sharma (216)

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ONCE A MARASI WENT TO A CHAUDHRY AND DEMANDED RISHTA OF CHAUDHRY`S DAUGHTER.CHAUDHRY AT ONCE BLEW UP AND HE ORDERED HIS MEN TO BEAT THT MARASI..AFTER 15 MINS OF "PHAINTI"THEY THREW HIM INFRONT OF THE CHAUDHRY...
MARASI STOOD UP SETTING HIS CLOTHES...
ASKED TO CHAUDHRY..
"TEY FIR MAIN INKAR E SAMJHAN" .
 
**************************************************************************************************
 
shortest resignation letter...
 
"SIR !!!!! I LOVE UR WIFE "
 
hehehee

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Himanshu (9616)

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Take a pencil and paper," the teacher said, "and write an essay with the title 'If I Were a Millionaire' " Everyone but Philip, who leaned back with arms folded, began to write furiously. "What's the matter," the teacher asked. "Why don't you begin?" "I'm waiting for my secretary," he replied.
 
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
85Year virgin dying lady wanted her grave to read"Born Virgin Lived Virgin Died Virgin".The sculptor shortened it to"PARCEL RETURNED UNOPENED"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
********A JATT passing thru a Jungle,
a Chudail stops him says: HOO HOO HA HA Mai Chudail huu
JATT: Jaanda haan Teri ik bhain mere ghar v hai. . ***************...hehehee
 
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Pappu, while filling up a form: Dad, what should I write for mother tongue.?
Dad: Very long
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Who Said English is so easy? Fill in this blank with "yes" or "no" 1)............... I don't have brain 2)................. I don't have sense 3)................. I am Stupid
 
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Son: Dad, what is an idiot? Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me? Son: No.
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Jab kisi ki taraf DiL jhukne lage.. Bat aa kar zubaan tak rukne lage To TO To TO To vicks ki goli lo Khikhich dur karo...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
 
LARKA: IS DIL MAI CHALI AAO JAANEMAN
LARKI : JOOTI UTAROO ?
LARKA : AISAY HI CHALI AAO ............. MASJID THORI HAI
 


I always like to walk in rain as no one can see me crying there :(
frnds are like diamonds , if u hit them , they don't break but they slip frm ur hands
-----It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.----
*****wen love and skill work together--expect a masterpiece*****






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Nivedh Iyer (3456)

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  *This sardarji goes to the see Jurassic Park and when the Dinosaurs start approaching he is cowering in his seat when his friend asks him "kyon sardarji, kya baat hai? Dar kyon lag raha hai cinema hi to hai" Sardarji replies "Aadmi hoon aur akkal hai, pata hai ki cinema hai lekin voh to janwar hai, usko kya pata "
 



*Sardarji is trying to commit suicide on the railway tracks and he takes along some wine and chicken with him. Somebody stops him and asks "kyon bhai, ye sab kyon leke baithe ho?" Sardarji replies "agar train late aati hai kahin bhook se na marjaun"




A dipper and a gora are sitting beside each other on a plane. It was a long flight to India so the gora said:"Let's play a game." The dipper said sure. The gora said let's play I spy. The dipper said sure. The gora started. He said I spy with my little eye something black. The dipper said suitcase? He was right. Then he said I spy with my little eye something that starts with the letter B. The gora looked hard for about ten minutes. Then finally he gave up .He said what was it. The dipper said look stupid gora "bindow"!



Then there were two sardars, Zail singh & Jarnail singh.
Both of them bought a horse each.

"How will we know which
is your & which is mine?" asked Zail.

"Easy"replied Jarnail.
"I'll cut mine's tail,yours will be the one with tail"

This was heard by a few boys ,they cut the other's tail too.

Next morning the confusion continued.
"Don't worry "retorted Jarnail.
"I'll tie a bell around its neck, yours will be the one without
  the bell."

The boys heard this also & cut the bell.

The next day, Zail got frustrated & said

"Okay now the last criterion,
white will be yours & black will be mine."

The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....

the PAIN or the PERSON...!!!
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diksha jeena (5)

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1
Sardar: I hav'nt slept all nite in the
train.
Friend: Y?
Sardar: Got upper berth.
Friend: Y did'nt u
Xchnged?
Sardar: oye, there was nobody 2 Xchng in the lower
  Berth..
 

2
Sardar tells a girl "Come 2 my house at night,
nobody
Will b there.............
Girl goes at night & really nobody
was there
3
A SARDAR went 2 a BANK to open a S.B. A/C.After seeing
the Form He had gone to DELHI for
Filling up. U knows y?
FORM said "
FILL UP IN CAPITAL ".

4
A sardar invested 2 Lakhs in a business and
Suffered
huge Loss.
Do u know what the business was? . . . . .
He
opened a Saloon in Punjab !.
5
A Teacher lecturing on population - In
India afterEvery 10 sec a women gives birth to a kid.A Sardar stands
up- we must find & stop her!.

6
Sardar-why r all these people
running?
Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If
only the winner will get the cup, why r
others running?

7
Sardar
had twins; he named them Tin Martin.
Again had twins & named Peter &
Repeater.
again twins & named Max & Climax.
Again d same. disgusted
Sardar named them
TIRED&RETIRED!

8
19 SARDARS WENT 4A FILM.ON
ASKING THEM Y THEY CAME
IN A BIG GROUP OF 19? THEY REPLIED THAT THE
FILM WAS
ONLY FOR ABOVE 18...

9
A sardharji photographer focusing
a dead body's face
in a funeral function, suddenly all relatives
beat
him why?
He said "SMILE PLEASE"

10
Teacher: "I killed a
person" convert this sentence
into future tense.
Sardar: The future
tense is "u will go to jail".

11
Srdr gets ready ,wears tie, coat
,goes out, climbs
tree, sits on the branch regularly. A man asks
why
he does this.
Srdr:"I've been promoted as branch
manager."

12
Sardarji standing below a tube light with a
open
mouth................. WHY?
because his doctor advised him
"Todays dinner should
be light"_-=

13
Sardarji was filling up
application form for a job.
He was not sure as to
what
to be filled
in column "Salary Expected".
After much thought he wrote :
Yes!

14
SARDAR & FAMILY GO 2 A PARTY. HE INTRODUCES HIMSELF
- I
SARDAR,SHE
SARDARNEE,
THE BOY MY KID & THE GIRL MY
KIDNEY....

15
One sardarji professor asked a plumber to come to
his
college.
U knw Why?
Because he wanted to check where the question
paper
is leaking...

16
Sardar told his servant: Go and water the
plants.
Servant: It"s already raining.
Sardar: So what take an
umbrella and go.

17
Santa! Your daughter has died!
Depressed,
Sardar jumps from 100th floor
At 50th floor he remembers I don't have
a daughter!
At 25flr:I'm unmarried!
At 10flr:I'm Banta not
santa

18
ON A ROMANTIC DATE SARDARS GIRL FRIEND ASKS
HIM,DARLING ON
OUR ENGAGEMENT WILL U GIVE ME A RING? HE SAID YA SURE WHATS YOUR PHONE
NUMBER

19
Sardar found the answer to the most difficult
question
ever - What will come first, Chicken or
egg?
O Yaar, what ever u order
first will come first.

20
A dog was chasing a Sardar and the Sardar
was
laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing?
Sardar: I have a Air
cell phone but still hutch
network is following me.

21
Sardar wins
20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket.
Dealer gave 11 cr after deducting
tax.
Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 cr or else return my 20
Rs
back.!

22
A teacher told all students in a class to write
an
essay on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except one
Sardarji.He wrote
"DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"

23
Postman:- I Have To
Come 5 Miles To Deliver U This
Packet Sardar:- why did u come so far.
Instead u
could have posted it....

24
What does a sardar do after
taking a xerox?
He will compare it with the original for any

spelling mistakes.

25
Sardar proposed a Girl......Girl said 'I'm
1yr elder
to you'...........
Sardar said 'Oye No Problem Soniye,I'll
marry you
NEXT YEAR.

26
WHY CANT SARDARS DIAL NINE-ELEVEN (911)
AT
EMERGENCY?
** THEY CAN NOT FIND THE ELEVEN ON THE
PHONE.

27
Sardar & his wife buy coffee in a shop.
Sardar says...
Drink quickly......
Wife asks why...
sardar says hot coffee Rs5 and
cold coffee Rs10

28) A Sardar & his wife filed an application 4
Divorce.
Judge asked: How'll U divide, U"VE 3 children?
Sardar
replied: Ok! We"ll
apply NEXT YEAR

29) Sardar's wish :when i die,i
wana die lik my grandpa
who died peacefuly in his sleep not screamin
like
all d passengers in d car he was driving..

31) Sardar at an Art
Gallery: I suppose this horrible
looking thing is what you call modern
art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!

32) Sardar
was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked:" Why r u writing so
slowly?
Sardar: "I'm writing 2 my 6 yr old son, he can't
read very
fast.

33) Sardar news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard
in
punjab . Local sardars have so far found 500
bodies and are still
digging for more..

34)A man asked sardarji, why Manmohan singh goes

walking at evening not in the morning. Sardarji
replied "Arey bhai
Manmohan is PM not AM".

35) Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in
hospital. Man
says CHIN YU YAN n dies.
Srdr goes2 china 2 find meaning
of friends last
words.
It is 'U R STANDNG ON D OXGN TUBE!"

36)
Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with
his eyes closed.
His
wife asked what you are doing ?
He said-im seeing how i look while
sleeping. 
 
     A Friend can tell i can understand ur feelings,               
But 
    A Real friend can tell I can feel ur Feelings.

art of living:
dont make frnds.
if made,dont go close to them.
if gone,dont like them.
if liked,dont trust them.
if trusted,then
DONT EVER LEAVE THEM................
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itee marvin (341)

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fantabulous is d word dat suits it bst
i thnk
rght?????????/
awesum jokes bro
gud work........
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Nivedh Iyer (3456)

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thanx........!!!!!!!!!!

The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....

the PAIN or the PERSON...!!!
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Nivedh Iyer (3456)

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.................

The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....

the PAIN or the PERSON...!!!
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Himanshu (9616)

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SARDAR talking on cell.
2ND SARDAR: kis se baat kar raho ho.
1ST: biwi se.....
2ND: itne... pyar se....?
1ST: tumhari hai. . .

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Sardar wanted to make a STD. call to punjab,
He wanted to save money so what did he do?
Simple, he went to punjab and made a local call.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Banta: Truck dekhkar tum kaampte kyon ho?
Santa: Ek truck driver meri biwi lekar bhaag gaya tha, har
baar lagta hai jaise usko vapas karne aya hai


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------


2 sardars were fighting after exam.
Sir: Y r u fighting?
1 Sardar: This fool left the answer sheet blank,
Sir: So what?
1 Sardar: Even i did the same thing, now teacher will think that we both copied

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------


One tourist from U.S.A. asked to Sardar: Any great man born in this village?
Sardar: no sir, only small Babies!!!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

sardar proposed a gal
gal said : i m 1 year elder than u
sardar replied
ooyaee no problem soniyee...
i vll marry u next year;)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Train mein TT Sadhu se bola: Kahan jana hai?
Sadhu: Jahan Ram ka janam hua tha.
TT: Ticket hai?
Sadhu: Nahin
TT: Chalo
Sadhu: Kahan?
TT: Jahan Krishan ka janam hua tha.. (Jail mein)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Sardar open his tiffin on the road.
Why???
Socho socho,
jaldi socho.
He wanted to check, "k mein office ja raha hoon ya ghar jaa raha hoon,.....

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sardar apni girlfriend se: i luv u! aur gir jata hai
girlfriend: oay tum bar bar yeh gir kyun rahay hoo?
sardar g: oay i m falling in love






I always like to walk in rain as no one can see me crying there :(
frnds are like diamonds , if u hit them , they don't break but they slip frm ur hands
-----It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.----
*****wen love and skill work together--expect a masterpiece*****






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bhuvana........ (753)

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Sardarni's Letter
Dear Gurmeet,
 
I am in a well here and hoping you in the same well there. I'm writing this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home.  Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved 20 miles.
I wont be able to send the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took the house numbers with them for their new house so they wouldn't have to change their address. Hopefully by next week we will be able
to take our earlier address Plate here, so that our address will remain same too.
This place is really nice.It even has a washing machine,situated right above the commode. I'm not sure it works too well.
Last week I put in 3 shirts, pulled the chain and havent seen them since. The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last week. The first time it rained for 3 days and second time for 4 days.
The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pocket.
Your father has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting The grass at the cemetery. By the way I took bahu to our club's poolside. The manager is badmash. He told her that two piece swimming suit is not allowed in this club. We were confused as to which piece should we remove?
Your sister had a baby this morning.I haven't found out whether it is a girl or a boy, so I don't know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle.
Your uncle, Jetinder fell in a the nearby well. Some men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off bravely and drowned. We cremated him and he burned for three days.
Your best friend, Balwinder, is no more. He died trying to fulfil his fathers last wishes. His father had wished to be buried in the sea after he died. And your friend died while in the process of digging a
grave for his father.
There isn't much more news this time. Nothing much has happened.
 
Love,
Mom
 
P.S : Beta, I was going to send you some money but by the time I realized, I had already sealed off this letter.
             

woods are lovely, dark and deep.....
but i have promises to keep....
and miles to go before i sleep....
and miles to go before i sleep....
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Rohan (1468)

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good job

Who says nothing is impossible.

I've been doing nothing for years !!..............


I know KUNG FU KARATE
and 47 other dangerous words.............

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Nivedh Iyer (3456)

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good.................!!!!!!!!!!!

The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....

the PAIN or the PERSON...!!!
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SINDHURA KADIYALA (47)

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ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaa
its really awesome................
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bhuvana........ (753)

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Be sure the person is Sardar
You can be sure the person is Sardar when he:
1. Puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to makeup
his mind.
 
2. Gets stabbed in a shoot-out.
 
3. Sends a fax with a postage stamp on it.
 
4. Tries to drown a fish in waters.
 
5. Thinks socialism means partying.
 
6.Trips over a cordless phone.
 
7.Takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
 
8.At the bottom of the application where it says "Sign Here" he puts Sagittarius."
 
9. Studies for a blood test and fails.
 
10.Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.
 
11. Drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, "Airport
left", he turns around and goes home.
 
12. Gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.
 
 
 NOTE  :   No Offence To Any Real Sardars.
 

woods are lovely, dark and deep.....
but i have promises to keep....
and miles to go before i sleep....
and miles to go before i sleep....
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p karthik (216)

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really gr8 awsum!!!!!!!!!!!
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Himanshu (9616)

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Sardar se kisi ny kaha
INDIAN
flag may tmhara kia hy
Green4 muslim
white4 christ
orang4 hindu
nothin 4u
Sardar thught n rplied
OYE .. !
DANDA TERE PIYO DA AY!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
SARDAR :: Beta ye kaisi machis lay kar aaye ho ek bhi nahi jal rahi??
SON :: kya baat kartay ho pappa sub check kar kay laya hoooon...
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
sardar and his wife:-
wife:- why r u studying seriously about blood?

sardar:-oey! doctor said tommarow blood test........
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Sardarji calls Air India. "How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?"
"Just a sec," says the receptionist. "Thank you." says the Sardar and

hangs up!
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Santa walks into a library & says, "Can I have a burger and coke?" Librarian, "I'm sorry, this is a library." Santa whispers, "Can I have a burger & fries?"
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Hitler to Sardarji: Impossible ka word meri dictionery main nahin hai.
Sardarji: Te gadhe  dictionery dekh k kharidni thi na...!
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Santa was drawing money from ATM. Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I've seen ur password. It?s ****. Santa: U r wrong. It?s 1394.
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
*************Why did santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole. *******
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Santa giving exam while standing at the door.
A man asked "Why are you standing at the door?"
Santa: "Idiot, I am giving entrance test."
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Teacher to santa: where were you born?
Santa: Thiruvananthapuram
Teacher: can u spell it?
Santa (after thinking for some time): I think I was born in GOA.
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Sadar to Thelewallah: yeh kele kaise diye?
Thelewallah : Ek rupay ka
Sardar: 60 p mein dega?
Thelewallah : 60p mein to sirf chilka aayega.
sardar : Oye! Chal ye leh 40 paise, chilka rakh, kela de de!!
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
******Santa: Main aur meri girlfriend shaadi kar rahe hain.
Banta: Wow, Kab?
Santa: Meri 7 Dec ko aur uski 13 Jan ko************
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
SARDAR & FAMILY GO 2 A PARTY. HE INTRODUCES HIMSELF
- I SARDAR, SHE SARDARNEE, THE BOY MY KID & THE GIRL MY KIDNEY....
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
 
GOIIT ROCKS!!!!!!!!

I always like to walk in rain as no one can see me crying there :(
frnds are like diamonds , if u hit them , they don't break but they slip frm ur hands
-----It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.----
*****wen love and skill work together--expect a masterpiece*****






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Himanshu (9616)

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when sardar experimenting a cockroach, he cut 1 of itz legz and told to walk. The cockroach began moving slowly. He continued thiz until all legz were cut out. Then he told it to walk, but it didnt move. So he wrote the interference:
"If all the legz of a cockroach were cut, it lozez itz ability to hear"
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
A dog was chasing a Sardar and the Sardar was laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing?
Sardar: I have a Airtel cell phone but still hutch network is
following me.
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Sardar to his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It"s already raining.
Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Sardar purposing a girl:darling kya tum mjhe se shadii karo gi?

girl:tameez se baat karo.

Sardar:behan jee,kya aap mjhe se shaadi karain gi?
 
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once sardar went to America .from there he shoot n caught a duck from pool the security caught him

security: do u have license of America to shoot this duck?
sardar: shown his license
security:looked back of the duck and said i think this is not American duck ?this is Indian duck?do u have license of India
sardar: shown his license
security asked license of many countries looking back of duck
sardar shown all countries license
then security said u r great

u r from which country
sardar shown his back and said u say u r expert in it na
 
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Santa: I have swallowed a kay.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Interviewer- Y did u leave ur last job?

Sardar- Coz, d company shifted its office and didnt tell me where....hehehe
 
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Do you know why Sardar bought a brown cow???







 
 
 
 
 
 

A: To get chocalate milk.........
 
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5 Hi-tech sardar inventions
1.Waterproof towel!
2.Solar powered torch!
3.Book on how to read!
4.Pedal powered wheel chair!
5.Umbrella wid holes to see wether its raining or not!
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
******After returning back from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife, Do I look like a foreigner? Wife: No! Why? Sardar: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner? ***************
 
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Ek american ek sardar se kaha hamare yahan saadi e-mail se bhi hoti hai isper sardar bola kamal hai hamare yahan to sirf female se hoti hai
 
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Shayari by Sardar:
Khidki se dekha to raaste pe koi nahi tha,
Khidki se dekha to raaste pe koi nahi tha,
Raaste pe jaa ke dekha to khidki pe koi nahi tha!!!
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
How do you keep a Sardar whole day busy?

Take him to a Circular Room and ask him to sit in a Corner!!!
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Teacher asked Sardar : "can a person have name & surname same ?"
Sardar replied : "YES", If Lara Dutta marries Brian Lara, her name
will be Lara Lara."
 
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**********************One day sardar was crying... friend asked to him..
friend: "Sardar why r u crying??"
sardar: "My mom died.."
After some time he started crying even louder...
friend: "Why r u crying now???"
Sardar: "My sister phoned to me and told that her mom also died..." *************
 
hehehe
 
well i again say , m sorry if i hurt ne 1 of u....
 
also see...we play jokes on sardars but have a look at this plzz...
 
 
cheers!!!!!!!!!
 
GOIIT ROCKS!!!!!

I always like to walk in rain as no one can see me crying there :(
frnds are like diamonds , if u hit them , they don't break but they slip frm ur hands
-----It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.----
*****wen love and skill work together--expect a masterpiece*****






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Nivedh Iyer (3456)

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hehe good one...........!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....

the PAIN or the PERSON...!!!
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akhil.katkar (2)

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Nice Jokes yaar

Akhil
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ramyani chakrabarty (3105)

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woow!! very refreshing

NIT silchar electrical engineering
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